Sadness

Horrible news on Friday. I read about the double homicide in the paper last week, never dreaming it would hit close to home for me. Friday morning, I was reading about the APD arresting two men, and the name of one jumped right out at me. .....Yrineo 'Neal' Flores.

I had Neal in the Behavior class his 6th, 7th and 8th grade years at Clack. For the eight years I taught BAC, he was my favorite. Even after he went on to Cooper, he made it a point to stay in touch by calling me in my classroom. Once he graduated, he would come by school to see me, and keep me up to date on his life. He had so much potential; he was bright, good looking,and had a kind heart...but his home life was not the greatest. Neal even came by to see me in December, seven months ago, the day before school was out.

For the last several days, I have been beating myself up...was there more I could have done? Anything I could have said? He will either get the death penalty, or spend the rest of his life in prison. I have been devastated since Friday. Today, during the sermon at church, I realized that Neal wouldn't have stayed in touch if he didn't know I loved him. He wouldn't have talked to me about God, if he didn't want to know more, all those years ago . He used to ask me to pray for him. Maybe I dropped the ball on that one....out of sight - out of mind. I talked to Phil about it at the end of church...I don't know if I should send him a note in jail, or just leave it be. Do I tell him that not only do I still love him in spite of what he did, that God does, as well? Or do I just let it all go?

I just pray that Neal will find my Jesus while he is locked away. That Neal will ask for forgiveness, be healed from his addictions, and learn to live for Him. Neal will be punished, I just pray he will become a child of God before he dies.