Horrible news on Friday. I read about the double homicide in the paper last week, never dreaming it would hit close to home for me. Friday morning, I was reading about the APD arresting two men, and the name of one jumped right out at me. .....Yrineo 'Neal' Flores.
I had Neal in the Behavior class his 6th, 7th and 8th grade years at Clack. For the eight years I taught BAC, he was my favorite. Even after he went on to Cooper, he made it a point to stay in touch by calling me in my classroom. Once he graduated, he would come by school to see me, and keep me up to date on his life. He had so much potential; he was bright, good looking,and had a kind heart...but his home life was not the greatest. Neal even came by to see me in December, seven months ago, the day before school was out.
For the last several days, I have been beating myself up...was there more I could have done? Anything I could have said? He will either get the death penalty, or spend the rest of his life in prison. I have been devastated since Friday. Today, during the sermon at church, I realized that Neal wouldn't have stayed in touch if he didn't know I loved him. He wouldn't have talked to me about God, if he didn't want to know more, all those years ago . He used to ask me to pray for him. Maybe I dropped the ball on that one....out of sight - out of mind. I talked to Phil about it at the end of church...I don't know if I should send him a note in jail, or just leave it be. Do I tell him that not only do I still love him in spite of what he did, that God does, as well? Or do I just let it all go?
I just pray that Neal will find my Jesus while he is locked away. That Neal will ask for forgiveness, be healed from his addictions, and learn to live for Him. Neal will be punished, I just pray he will become a child of God before he dies.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Life = changes and adjustments!!!
Okay, much has happened since I last posted.
The roommate Thomas had, turned out to be a major abuser of drugs and alcohol. We moved him out one Monday, moved his stuff home. By Wednesday, I had found him another duplex....a one bedroom, so no roomie problems. He was working that night, so, back to U-Haul I went...and Luke and I moved him in. By Thursday, I was exhausted, mentally and physically.
His new place is amazing...wooden floors, yard for Izzy to 'go' in, cute kitchen, just right for my Thomas.
Last weekend, my darling Luke graduated from Cooper. My brother and family (seven of them) came in from Chicago, and my favorite aunt and uncle were here from College Station. She is my Daddy's sister, and she has the same (weird) sense of humor my Daddy had. It is a joy to be around her. We all went out to the Home Place for dinner on Friday, then to graduation on Saturday afternoon.
I never knew it would be such a relief to see my youngest child walk across that stage. Sixteen years ago, following my divorce, I made a vow to raise my sons as Godly Young Men!! Wow....I guess I am through with the day-to-day hands-on mothering. It's a relief...but much sadness.
Thomas is already living on his own. Luke will be attending Tech in the fall, and is moving to Lubbock to live with his dad and stepmom TOMORROW!! He needs to find a job before school starts in August. He has spent the last two days cleaning his room...yes, it needs it. Don't think it's been clean in over 8 months. You can actually see the rug again...even though the tan color is a bit dingy.
Life is change. Life is adjustment. So many people have said, "Oh, you will have an empty nest. How will you cope?" Do they not understand that I have been the main/only caretaker for the last 16 years? Yes, I will cry tomorrow. But then, life will go on. I will spend the remainder of the summer, reading, working out, going to the pool, learning who I am again! Me - minus sons = who????
I AM looking forward to free time, not worrying about where they are and who they are with. The way I see it....I have taken care of Luke for 16 years...his dad can do it for 2 months, before Luke moves into the dorm. Besides, this is a great opportunity for Luke to actually get to know his dad and stepmom. (good or bad!!) When Thomas spent time living with them several years ago, he appreciated me much more when he returned. In fact, his comment was, "Mom, I always thought you lead such a boring life. Then I went to Dad's, and ya know, BORING is GOOD!"
Tomorrow, tears of sadness that Luke is leaving; joy that my 'job' is semi-finished; relief that I can find out who I am without being someone's mother; and peace in that I did the job God asked me to do.
Forward and Onward!!!
The roommate Thomas had, turned out to be a major abuser of drugs and alcohol. We moved him out one Monday, moved his stuff home. By Wednesday, I had found him another duplex....a one bedroom, so no roomie problems. He was working that night, so, back to U-Haul I went...and Luke and I moved him in. By Thursday, I was exhausted, mentally and physically.
His new place is amazing...wooden floors, yard for Izzy to 'go' in, cute kitchen, just right for my Thomas.
Last weekend, my darling Luke graduated from Cooper. My brother and family (seven of them) came in from Chicago, and my favorite aunt and uncle were here from College Station. She is my Daddy's sister, and she has the same (weird) sense of humor my Daddy had. It is a joy to be around her. We all went out to the Home Place for dinner on Friday, then to graduation on Saturday afternoon.
I never knew it would be such a relief to see my youngest child walk across that stage. Sixteen years ago, following my divorce, I made a vow to raise my sons as Godly Young Men!! Wow....I guess I am through with the day-to-day hands-on mothering. It's a relief...but much sadness.
Thomas is already living on his own. Luke will be attending Tech in the fall, and is moving to Lubbock to live with his dad and stepmom TOMORROW!! He needs to find a job before school starts in August. He has spent the last two days cleaning his room...yes, it needs it. Don't think it's been clean in over 8 months. You can actually see the rug again...even though the tan color is a bit dingy.
Life is change. Life is adjustment. So many people have said, "Oh, you will have an empty nest. How will you cope?" Do they not understand that I have been the main/only caretaker for the last 16 years? Yes, I will cry tomorrow. But then, life will go on. I will spend the remainder of the summer, reading, working out, going to the pool, learning who I am again! Me - minus sons = who????
I AM looking forward to free time, not worrying about where they are and who they are with. The way I see it....I have taken care of Luke for 16 years...his dad can do it for 2 months, before Luke moves into the dorm. Besides, this is a great opportunity for Luke to actually get to know his dad and stepmom. (good or bad!!) When Thomas spent time living with them several years ago, he appreciated me much more when he returned. In fact, his comment was, "Mom, I always thought you lead such a boring life. Then I went to Dad's, and ya know, BORING is GOOD!"
Tomorrow, tears of sadness that Luke is leaving; joy that my 'job' is semi-finished; relief that I can find out who I am without being someone's mother; and peace in that I did the job God asked me to do.
Forward and Onward!!!
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Life certainly goes by fast!!
This weekend was yet another momentous occasion for me. After my run on Saturday, I helped my oldest son, Thomas, move out. He and a friend found a duplex not far from McMurry to share. He is SOOO excited that he has his own bathroom! (Yes, folks, my little 1200 sqft home has three bedrooms, but only one bath to share between us.) It is the cutest thing, even complete with a sun room.
Seems like just yesterday when the three of us moved back to Abilene, from Lubbock, for me to go through Region 14 ESC alternative certification program. It was April 15th, 1994, and I was going to be the permanent sub for AISD in one of the classrooms at Woods Psychiatric. Thomas was five years old, and spending his last six weeks of Kindergarten at Bowie Elementary, my old elementary school. (We even had the same music teacher! ) Now, he is a junior at McMurry, majoring in 4-8 English Education, and is on his own.
Time does fly....I love ya, TC.
Seems like just yesterday when the three of us moved back to Abilene, from Lubbock, for me to go through Region 14 ESC alternative certification program. It was April 15th, 1994, and I was going to be the permanent sub for AISD in one of the classrooms at Woods Psychiatric. Thomas was five years old, and spending his last six weeks of Kindergarten at Bowie Elementary, my old elementary school. (We even had the same music teacher! ) Now, he is a junior at McMurry, majoring in 4-8 English Education, and is on his own.
Time does fly....I love ya, TC.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
I finished!!
Okay, today was another momentous day in the life of Sharon Cochran. I ran a 5K race at Redbud, and finished! It has been over 20 years since I entered a race. (back when I weighed 120 and was a mere 30 years old!) It was funny, I was so relieved when I passed the finish line, I didn't even look at my time! I'll have to check the paper, or the running club site to see how I did. Generally I run about a 14-15 minute mile. Never in any hurry.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Vacation in Austin
What a week! On Tuesday, at 3:30, I drove to Austin and checked into the Embassy for a three day committee meeting. Beginning Wednesday morning, I joined about 20 people to begin revising the TAKS M. What a process! Did I learn a lot this week, not only about procedures but also how tedious the entire process truly is, YES!
I also had a blast! The two folks I happened to be sitting with were from the Panhandle, one from Dimmitt, the other from Plainview. My two partners in crime for the week! We sat together, ate together, hung out together, and complained about the 'showoffs' in the group, together. You know what I mean. Invariably, when a committee is called there are one or two folks who have to talk ALL the time. Those folks want to always have the last word, and want everyone to know they totally believe more in themselves than in the process. Well, our group really had three. So Judy, who is about 4 foot 7 inches tall was ready to take out Brucie, the one who constantly flirted with the TEA folks. I was going to take out Candy, who actually, truly raised her hand each time she had something to say, like a kid needing to go the restroom, (and yes, waited until someone actually called on her.) She was more interested in impressing the Pearson folks. And Paula was going to be Erlinda's to take out. Paula just complained about everything.
If I hadn't had Judy and Erlinda, I think the week would have been extremely boring. We decided if we are invited back, we will insist the other two return as well....or for that matter, if one of us is called back, the other two will just show up, share the free room, and have a great time, without the meeting!!!
I also had a blast! The two folks I happened to be sitting with were from the Panhandle, one from Dimmitt, the other from Plainview. My two partners in crime for the week! We sat together, ate together, hung out together, and complained about the 'showoffs' in the group, together. You know what I mean. Invariably, when a committee is called there are one or two folks who have to talk ALL the time. Those folks want to always have the last word, and want everyone to know they totally believe more in themselves than in the process. Well, our group really had three. So Judy, who is about 4 foot 7 inches tall was ready to take out Brucie, the one who constantly flirted with the TEA folks. I was going to take out Candy, who actually, truly raised her hand each time she had something to say, like a kid needing to go the restroom, (and yes, waited until someone actually called on her.) She was more interested in impressing the Pearson folks. And Paula was going to be Erlinda's to take out. Paula just complained about everything.
If I hadn't had Judy and Erlinda, I think the week would have been extremely boring. We decided if we are invited back, we will insist the other two return as well....or for that matter, if one of us is called back, the other two will just show up, share the free room, and have a great time, without the meeting!!!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Luke turns 18 Friday!!
My 'baby' Luke is turning 18 on Friday!! I came home today and told him that almost 16 years ago, when I left his dad, I remember thinking, "How on earth will I make it through the next years as an only parent? And look, here we are!! You are all grown up!" He was grinning so big!! My baby is almost an adult.
When he was born all those years ago, the night before we were supposed to come home from the hospital, I let the nurses keep Luke in the nursery for that night, since I knew I would be losing sleep once we got home. The doctor came in about midnight to say that the nurses had done CPR on Luke three times and brought him back. Over the next 17 days, my baby was put through numerous tests, sticks, and lived 24 hours a day in NICU. Finally, he was diagnosed with bacterial meningitis. He contracted it from someone in the operating room, (he was a c-section) since they tested me, and I didn't have it. I went to see him as often as I could, even though I was not supposed to be driving. They would NOT keep me away from my child. I would gown up, lift him up amongst the wires and tubes and rock him in the rocking chair in NICU. When we finally got him home, I counted 27 stick marks on him. That poor baby.
To this day, Luke has a very high pain tolerance. When he does tell me he hurts, or is sick, I know he truly is!
Luke almost died so many times years ago, that I know God has tremendous plans for his future. He has such a sensitive nature, soft heart and amazing sense of humor, who knows where God will lead him! I am anxious to watch and see!
Happy Birthday my beloved Luke!!! I love you!
When he was born all those years ago, the night before we were supposed to come home from the hospital, I let the nurses keep Luke in the nursery for that night, since I knew I would be losing sleep once we got home. The doctor came in about midnight to say that the nurses had done CPR on Luke three times and brought him back. Over the next 17 days, my baby was put through numerous tests, sticks, and lived 24 hours a day in NICU. Finally, he was diagnosed with bacterial meningitis. He contracted it from someone in the operating room, (he was a c-section) since they tested me, and I didn't have it. I went to see him as often as I could, even though I was not supposed to be driving. They would NOT keep me away from my child. I would gown up, lift him up amongst the wires and tubes and rock him in the rocking chair in NICU. When we finally got him home, I counted 27 stick marks on him. That poor baby.
To this day, Luke has a very high pain tolerance. When he does tell me he hurts, or is sick, I know he truly is!
Luke almost died so many times years ago, that I know God has tremendous plans for his future. He has such a sensitive nature, soft heart and amazing sense of humor, who knows where God will lead him! I am anxious to watch and see!
Happy Birthday my beloved Luke!!! I love you!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Better and better...AMEN!!
Okay, life is good, better, and hopefully it will continue to be. I have made the decision that I have done my best as a mom, and that is all I can do. God put me in charge of raising my sons, and I trusted Him to help me, and I have done so. The rest is in their hands.
I followed Luke and his date tonight. They were heading to Winter Formal, but eating dinner at a friend's dad's house. Luke told me not to worry about pictures, but he seemed a bit pleased when I showed up to take lots of pictures. His date is a girl that was in the next crib during day care after birth...yep! He and Alanna have known each other for almost 18 years. (Luke's birthday is next Friday) Here is a great photo of them!! (wouldn't load, will try later)
Also, since August I have been going to aerobics at McMurry from 2 to 4 nights a week. Over Christmas I really got back into running, from 2 to 4 miles a day. AND I am finally losing weight...woo hoo!! Feel so much better, and better about myself. The exercise does wonders for my emotional and mental health.
Life is looking up!! God is good!!
I followed Luke and his date tonight. They were heading to Winter Formal, but eating dinner at a friend's dad's house. Luke told me not to worry about pictures, but he seemed a bit pleased when I showed up to take lots of pictures. His date is a girl that was in the next crib during day care after birth...yep! He and Alanna have known each other for almost 18 years. (Luke's birthday is next Friday) Here is a great photo of them!! (wouldn't load, will try later)
Also, since August I have been going to aerobics at McMurry from 2 to 4 nights a week. Over Christmas I really got back into running, from 2 to 4 miles a day. AND I am finally losing weight...woo hoo!! Feel so much better, and better about myself. The exercise does wonders for my emotional and mental health.
Life is looking up!! God is good!!
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